Fashion Boston - October 2008

BY BETH TEITELL

Party Politics

In the thick of social season, one hostess’s well-planned fete is another’s well of stress.

Why don’t I throw more parties? I’m a fun person. I like to entertain. True, I rarely actually do entertain, but I did, well, 15 years ago. But my current home is too small. Yes, I know, I always managed to have people over when I lived in a Beacon Hill apartment so tiny and sparsely furnished that a burglar who broke in literally left empty-handed. “Can you even file a police report?” a neighbor asked. “Can you come to a party tomorrow night?” I replied.

But even if I did have enough room for my guests, who exactly would all these people I don’t have room for be? And why aren’t they having parties at their houses instead? Heaven knows, they’ve got the room. In fact, it’s their large houses that are making my perfectly ample condo feel relatively tight. What’s their excuse?

Maybe it has to do with the food. That I could understand. What are you supposed to serve? Isn’t everyone all chicken-skewered and smoked-salmoned and small-plated out? Can anyone look at another bowl of guacamole? And even if I figured out something exciting, what would I serve it on? Why don’t I have nice platters like real grown-ups do? Oh, wait, I do. I got several lovely trays as wedding gifts, but they’re packed away. I didn’t need them anymore; I don’t throw parties.

But hey, you know what is easily accessible in my kitchen? Coffee cups and saucers. I must have two dozen. I never drink from them, of course. I use mugs and save the good stuff for when company comes over — except who wants to face all those dirty cups at the end of an evening? They take up so much room in the dishwasher. If I ever do have people over and they insist on coffee, I’ll use Styrofoam.

At least that’s what I’d like to do, but I can only imagine how
people would talk. Doesn’t she care about the environment? And
I can see their point. But why are my guests judging me? Here I’ve
gone to all this trouble to throw a party and people are gossiping?

It’s no wonder I don’t entertain.

ILLUS TRATION B Y NATHALIE DION/ AGOODSON.COM

I BETH TEITELL IS A BOSTON-BASED WRITER AND AUTHOR OF THE JUST-RELEASED BOOK “DRINKING PROBLEMS AT THE FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH,” A TAKEDOWN OF OUR SOCIETY’S OBSESSION WITH LOOKING FOREVER YOUNG. SHE HAS JUST RECENTLY LEARNED TO WALK IN HEELS. SHE CAN BE E-MAILED AT BTEITELL@GMAIL.COM.

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